All Aboard the Holiday Struggle Bus

 It's one day away from December and a lot of us are probably already in the same boat. Not quite a week after Thanksgiving and we are feeling just as stuffed as the Turkeys we popped out of the oven and down our gullets. We're at the point where we are slowing down, getting behind on routines, and pet projects are being brushed in favor of holiday festivities -- albeit socially distanced this year. It's easy to get lost in everything going on around us -- on top of the crap show that already is 2020.

I've been struggling with motivation for months and it has only been compounded by the holiday shopping, cooking, unhealthy snacking, and general seasonal blase that I go through every winter.

Writers and other creatives really struggle this time of year, adding to increased chances of suffering from seasonal affected disorder and general stress.

True, family stress might seem to be reduced this season as many people are opting not to gather with relatives for the holidays but the truth may be just the opposite. What's the number one gift that family gives to one another? Guilt. If you think guilt won't be an issue this year, you might want to think again. Seeing grandma's sad face over that zoom call isn't going to make you feel any better while stuffing gingerbread men in your mouth with only your pets to watch you this year.

We're all in a predicament this year. So, how do we combat it to get ourselves back on track?

1. Try giving yourself dedicated time to indulge yourself in your hobbies.

It doesn't necessarily have to be writing or anything as complex as creating something to start. Put together a puzzle, read a book, watch a movie. The important thing is that you need to have a safe space to turn your brain off and let it rest. Stress is a monster that eats away at creativity and relaxing your mind will go a long way toward healing it enough for motivation to come back. You may find that as you indulge in this restful time that you have an urge to create -- go for it! If not, then just kick back and relax with this dedicated time. If you repeat it enough you may feel the spark come back.

2. Don't let outside forces make you feel guilty for doing the right thing.

This is easier said than done. We have a whole lot of pressure on us to behave a certain way. In this trying time most of us have opted to stay safe and do our part to get through this pandemic. Yet, we all have friends and family that don't understand that and will do their best to guilt or shame us into doing something we don't want to do. You're not a bad person or a monster for saying no. Find a way to connect with other people who are going through the same situation. Social media is filled with folks who are dealing with these same struggles. Some treat it with humor, others need a virtual shoulder to lean on. It's okay. It's also okay to acknowledge the guilt and that it's okay to NOT be okay right now. Nothing about this time in our lives is normal.

3. The kids are driving you nuts? Super parent needs to take a rest and give in to compromise. 

For generations parents have been mocked when letting the kids watch too much tv or play video games, but in all honesty these are no normal times and if you live in a frozen tundra for several months of the year "go outside and play" isn't always an option. Here in Michigan we can experience weeks at a time where going outside to play isn't an option. Don't feel guilty for giving the kids games and videos to experience. Try to balance it with books and educational materials but our kids are going through the stress of this pandemic with us. They internalize a lot of it, and react far differently from it than we do, but it doesn't mean that they aren't suffering. They need an outlet, and if that outlet is sniping zombies in a virtual environment then they should be allowed that opportunity. A content child is going to be far less clingy and will allow dad or mom the space necessary to engage in their own stress mitigation steps or hobbies.

4. What if you're motivated but don't have the time for your craft?

This is a boat that I am almost always in. I have writing that I want to do, but it's hard to find the time to hide away and scribe. I call my solution 'guerrilla creativity.' I will often leave my chromebook open and handy. If my 4 year old is heading into the bathroom to take a wicked poop I will open it up and get a few sentences down. WHEW! 50 words! Not a lot of progress, right? No, but if you can find ten times throughout the course of a day to jump back to your work in a similar manner you can turn those 50 words into 500. A child's bedtime is also a great opportunity to spend even just a few moments working.

5. Leave the phone out of the room when you're writing or creating.

I see this a LOT on social media: "I should be writing but here I am on Twitter." Listen, this may come as a surprise but for every benefit smartphone technology has gifted upon us it has brought about an equally detrimental habit. I didn't even begin my writing career until after I deleted facebook a year and a half ago. After I did that I published 2 books. That's a whole lot of wasted time dickering with social media that I could have spent starting this career earlier in life. I'm not telling everyone to delete social media. It is necessary for some people to stay in touch, particularly in this socially distanced year, but there are times the phone shouldn't be with you. In this one respect treat your alone time as respectfully as you would treat a funeral or a job. Leave the phone silenced and, if possible, out of the room. If you don't feel comfortable going that far then just make sure it's only set to ring for emergencies. The whole point is to eliminate distractions and temptations. Once you take away that deliciously tempting toy your mind will naturally focus more on what you want to accomplish. 

This is only a partial list of ways for creatives to cope. We live in a weird world right now. We always say to try to be kind to one another, but it is equally important to be kind to ourselves. Take care of the foundation of your career/hobby -- that means you.